It's near 11PM and I am standing in my kitchen with the 2 nearly-growns. Conner leaning in from the porch through the sliders. When he shifts his weight he eclipses the light falling from the street lamp. His sister sits. Leaning over the table top delicately picking grapes one by one and eating them slowly.
I can't help but to wonder if among the boxes are the children's books I gave them for Baby J. The books that once belonged to Alex and Conner- some that even once belong to me and my sisters. I wonder if they made the final cut or not.
But stuff is only stuff.
I had spent most of the day in bed sick. Stayed up late to get to be in this moment with them. The night pressed in as Conner talked. They had a house, a large one with plenty of room and a long lawn for Baby J. He said he could smell the ocean from there. He had a job making good money.
They smiled, they talked and I was glad the rest of the house was sleeping. Glad to have this moment just for us.