the trouble with the Second Rooster

The trouble is, being second when there is only room for one, is a bit of pinch. One might say you could lose your head over it. 

The Second Rooster is a beautiful but skittish character.

Smaller than his father he has been getting by just fine, prowling the perimeter of the yard. He scores a few young hens here and there, and enough food to live on.

It was going mostly well for him until he crowed. I happened to be in the yard reading, trying to make the most of being sick on a beautiful spring day when it he hopped up on the fence and let one rip. 

I launched at stick at him, not to be mean, quite the opposite. As long as he stayed callow, well, the longer he stayed at all. 

The stick missed but the point didn't. He fluttered awkwardly off the fence. He scratched in the weeds for a moment and then crowed again. There was no denying him: he is a Rooster. A Second Rooster on a one rooster farm.

Now the trick for us, the farmers, is knowing whether or not he would be a good First Rooster. See, roosters do not all act the same or even act like their former selves once they are put in charge- sort of like Politicians. And the tricky part is "knowing" if one would be a nice and kind ruler after being promoted. One's promotion also means an irreversible demotion to the one he would be replacing. It is important to get it right as often as possible.

And as it goes, many a young promising cocks have failed to secure a repeat season as the First Rooster around here. 

One was flat out so mean and nasty he was "retired" before an audience of people (and hens) who enjoyed watching him go. It was rather medieval and drinks were served.  

Another was removed for a crow that started out okay but then trilled into the most god awful hacking sound. It was horribly embarrassing. He was dispatched of rather quickly. 

Two others have tried but proved either too aggressive with the hens or too mean with their own chicks. 

One of those is remembered more for his death than his life. I don't recall his real name, he is refereed to as Zombie Rooster. The bird that managed to get his head chopped off but not die from it. Under the cover of darkness BC had done some late night flock thinning, Zombie Rooster included. The next morning you can imagine my surprise while out water the rows of tomatoes to be approached by a walking headless bird. It is one of those moments in life only Saturday morning cartoons can emotionally prepare you for. 

There have been successful reigns too. Fuzz Balls I and IV each lived long lives, as far as Roosters go that is. Big Red also had a few good seasons.

Our current Rooster is a nice enough guy, not too old, and pretty enough. However, I personally think the Second Rooster is rather promising. It's hard to say what will become of him. But there can't be 2...trust me I know, I've asked that question before.