ready to go home

I spent yesterday watching the Las Vegas sky change. All alone in the house we rented.  I was home sick but not actually at home.  

The girls were back at the meet venue, BC hiking in Red Rocks, Jeff heading back to SLC for work.

The house is nice.  Nicer than our own.  I love these house for their minimalism. 

My favorite, would have been the Ohio house.  I'm not even sure why.  Perhaps it was the way it held us safe and comfortable while still being in walking distance to all we needed.

I love the inspiration of the rented houses.  The reminder of how little we honestly need.  A space that frames your life a little differently.  A strange view of yourself.  None of them alike and yet they are all the same.

But I'm ready to go now.
Ready to pack up and go home.

I haven't felt this homesick in a long time.

In my head I can already see the girls (who are still in bed) in the back seat of the car as we drive the interstate.  I see sunlight and winter fields go by.  I see bathroom stops and gas station potato wedges.  I see the sun moving across the desert sky.  Distance and miles slipping away.

I can see myself closing the front door of our house behind us as we carry in the last bag from the car.

I want to walk out the door into my own backyard.  Cross the garden and slip the gate.  I want to go home.  I want to see my other children and Baby J.

I want to watch the Las Vegas sky disappear in the rearview mirror.

One day I want to move to White Pine County, Nevada.  Buy land and a small house.  Start over in a new town.  But not today.  Today I want to go back and pick up where we left off.