Tuesday, April 9, 2019

a thousand more

I don't know what to write. It's like standing in the outfield not knowing which way to be ready to run. Perhaps that is why I say, play ball, following the National Anthem at Meets. But the question as to whether or not Beach will compete at Regionals is pretty much answered. Although, I doubt anyone but me ever questioned it in the first place. As of right now, she is going.
I personally realized it after a week (or longer) of not being able to do her flick-lay (or even a flick for that matter) she got up on the beam and did a whole routine flick-lay included.
She isn't landing her vault, her bar routine is under 2 weeks old, 
and she has yet to do a floor routine on the actual floor. But she is also Beach. 
Hence, the outfield wondering. This could really be bad. It could be okay. It could even be great. Chances are it will be a mixture of all of those. Most meets are. 
Regionals should be more like a victory lap than anything else. But when injuries get mixed it, it feels like someone moved the finish line back a few extra miles in an already long race.
The biggest "known" possibility is that Regionals will be the last time she competes her current floor routine. She will be getting a new routine for next season. Dance Steps Through The Dim (10/21/17), is the blog post I wrote about her getting this routine: "When she competes this routine for the first time in early December the judges will never know she learned it "blind".  That she learned it mostly from feeling it- listening to the directions under Donna's lead but not always able to see her demonstrations.  Limited too by the small slow healing avulsion fracture in her hip." 

There was no way to know when I wrote that what was ahead.
No way to see how much she was about to accomplish. In her 2nd season competing this routine, 
she has taken 1st on Floor 6 out of 7 meets! All while battling the pain of a compression fracture in her back. 
I try to picture what it will be like this weekend watching her out there competing but I am not great with the unknown. I don't know what she is physically capable of doing right now. I don't know what her body and her heart have in them. 
I don't know her as her coaches and teammates do. I am her mom. I stand back in the outfield trying to catch whatever comes my way. Standing, waiting and squinting into the sun. Loving and hating every moment of it.
My job is to get her there.  
The rest is up to her.

2 comments:

  1. Your job is to get her there and do hair - don't forget meet hair....

    And Beach will do what she needs to do, and she will do it beautifully, and no one will ever really know what it costs her. This is the beauty and sorrow of gymnastics.
    This is Beach.

    As aLways someone in Switzerland will be cheering for her this weekend.

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  2. Thank you so much for supporting her. I will pass your words on <3

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