I only have a few minutes to spend here. I wanted to sit down on write yesterday but I ran out of time. Now that I am here I'm not sure what it is that I want to say. I am struggling.
Beach's appointment with Spine Clinic is in a few hours. Every time I start to get dramatic and worry that it could be a moment that changes the world before her I remember most likely we will have no more answers at the end of this day than we had at the end of any other day.
I worry they will require more testing that we can't really pay for.
I worry something was missed the first time.
I worry that something will be missed this time.
I worry she won't hear the words she needs to hear.
I worry that she will walk away from gymnastics and still be in pain.
And somewhere deep in the part of my heart that holds her hopes, I worry that she won't get to do what she could have done...
Beach will end up taking the path that she needs to take. Right now it might not seem like that, but when one door shuts 100's more will open. It's hard to imagine.
ReplyDeleteEmily has been in this sport a lot less time than Beach, and sadly her option to continue in gymnastics was removed. Just as she was finally getting it, just as she was moving through the ranks.
She raged, she screamed, she was sad and lost and furious in equal measure. But now we look back and are thankful for the journey.
It has shaped the person she is, and it's taken 4 long months, but she is also starting to see other opportunities.
Gymnastics made Beach into the extraordinary person she is today - the beauty is that even when gymnastics is over it won't take that away.